I love Donald Trump.

There, I said it.

I love The Donald.

I love his presidential candidacy. And I love his supporters.

Does my love make you angry?

Are you thinking, “How the f**k can a Zen teacher possibly love Donald Trump?!?”

If so, then please keep reading. This article (and the free guided meditation at the end) are perfect for you.

No, I’m Not Joking

If you think I’m somehow joking about loving Trump, then you’re going to be disappointed.

I’m not joking. I do actually love him.

The more he opens his bigoted, hate-filled mouth, the more love I send.

Early this morning, I sat on my meditation cushion and sent loving kindness toward Donald Trump using an ancient Zen technique called Metta.

I did the same thing yesterday.

It looks like I’ll probably be doing it again tomorrow.

Why Loving Kindness is the Answer

Trump’s candidacy is running on a platform of hatred, mistrust, fear, and anger.

Do you stand against those things?

If so – and I’m assuming that you do if you’ve read this far – then it is critical that you do not become that which you stand against.

If you respond with hatred, then hatred wins.

And when hatred wins, Trump wins.

Your outrage against Trump’s bigotry is 100% justified, but your hatred is not.

This might be a good time for a quote from a little green Zen master:

What Trump is Teaching Me about Zen

Listening to Trump makes me want to scream.

Not very Zen, I know. Perhaps you can relate?

I know that anger and hatred are not the solution. And yet, I know that I have to do SOMETHING.

This quote comes to mind:

“The world is a dangerous place to live, not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don’t do anything about it.” – Albert Einstein

Thanks to Trump, I’m learning that there is something I can do — something important, something that will not only have a positive effect on the world, but also on me.

Here’s what Lao Tzu said 2500 years ago:

“If you want to awaken all of humanity, then awaken all of yourself. If you want to eliminate the suffering in the world, then eliminate all that is dark and negative in yourself. Truly, the greatest gift you have to give is that of your own self-transformation.” – Lao Tzu

You want to awaken all of humanity, right?

I bet you want to wake up Trump supporters, shaking them until they come to their senses.

It won’t work. It never works.

If you want to awaken them, if you want to show them that hatred is not the answer, then start with yourself.

Why I’m Taking a Stance

Let me back up a bit.

Let me explain why I’m taking a stance on this issue:

Because my wife is brown. She was born in Venezuela, she is beautiful, and she is brown. Trump didn’t specifically say anything about Venezuelans, but he might as well have insulted all Latin Americans for all the bigoted comments he made about Mexicans.

Because I want to stand in solidarity with my Mexican friends and students. I’ve been to Mexico, and I love my friends and students there. I want them to know that I don’t agree with what Trump has said about Mexicans.

Because I want to stand in solidarity with my Muslim friends and students. Trump’s anti-Muslim rhetoric is dangerous, and unacceptable, and I want that to be clear to everyone. Below is a picture of me and my wife at a Muslim wedding a year ago. If I’m slightly scared to post a picture from a Muslim wedding, what must it be like for all my Muslim-American friends?

Because of what a middle-eastern Jewish Rabbi once said. He said that we should love our enemies, that we should bless those who curse us, and that we should do good to them that hate us. I think those are pretty wise words. [Matthew 5:44.]

Because of what an Indian monk said 2500 years ago. He said that hatred does not cease through hatred, that hatred only ceases through love. [Verse 5 of the Dhammapada.] He also gave us a technique for practicing this, which I’ll share with you below!

Because…science! Meditation can change the world. Here’s some proof.

What Happens if We Don’t Take a Stance

They say that those who don’t learn from history are bound to repeat it.

Well folks, we are watching history repeat itself. It’s happening right now.

Normally, I cringe whenever someone compares a politician to Hitler. It’s usually just hyperbole.

Trump’s comments, however, rightfully deserve to be compared to Nazi Germany. And to McCarthyism. And the Jim Crow laws. And to the unconstitutional internment of Japanese Americans during WWII.

Recently, Trump called to have a special database to identify Muslims in America.

And then the other day, Trump called to block all Muslims from entering America.

It’s tempting to dismiss Trump.

And yet, he is the leading candidate for a major political party, running for the highest office of the most powerful country in the world.

Resist the strong temptation to dismiss him and his supporters.

Do something.

What You Can Do

Below is an audio file with a 10-minute guided meditation that you can practice right now.

There are no gimmicks here. You don’t need to buy anything. You don’t even need to give me your email.

The audio is free.

I give it to you in the sincere hope that you will actually practice it.

Remember – it takes practice to be a master of loving kindness.

If you practice this meditation, and find it difficult – congratulations! You are human!

It is sure to be uncomfortable and awkward for you to practice loving kindness toward Trump and his followers.

But you know what? You are already uncomfortable! Every time you read about Trump  in the news, you cringe. Right?

The discomfort that you experience during Loving Kindness Meditation is no worse than what you feel when reading the news.

And it gets easier. The more you practice, the easier it gets.

Loving Kindness Guided Meditation (10 Minutes)

To save this audio file to your computer for future use, just right-click here and then choose “save as”.

The post Can Trump Teach Us Something About Zen? appeared first on Flowing Zen.

Sex in America

In Greece, women go topless on the beaches. In America, just a picture of a woman — not even a topless image, mind you — can make some people squirm with discomfort.

Why?

America is #1 in a lot of things.

We are the undisputed champions of baseball, basketball, and REAL football. We have the #1 military in the world. Oorah!

And until very recently, we were the fattest country in the world.

But when it comes to sexual satisfaction, we’re not #1. We’re not even #2. In fact, we’re hardly on the list at all.

It’s probably no surprise that Greece, Brazil, and Italy are at the top of the list of the most sexually satisfied countries in the world.

But get ready to have your mind blown:  Switzerland and Germany are also way ahead of us in sexual satisfaction.

What gives? Is the beer THAT much better over there?

In a previous article, I started a conversation about sex in America. I talked about how there is an imbalance in the way that Americans manage their sexual energy.  And I talked about how we could learn a thing or two about sex from the ancient Taoists.

Hormones and Health

When your sexual energy is blocked, then your health will suffer. In my article about the 12 things that are blocking you from healing, I listed sexual fulfillment as one of the 12.

And it’s a big one.

When your sexual energy is blocked you’ll experience all sorts of negative symptoms, from frustration to lack of creativity to low back pain. But it’s even worse than that.

Blocked sexual energy affects your hormone production. It’s hard, if not impossible, to be full of vitality when your hormones are aren’t working correctly.

How to Get Unblocked

So how do we start getting unblocked? How do we begin to heal our society? How do we save America from the sexual frustration terrorists?!?

As we must do with all change, we must start with ourselves. Change comes from within. Here are some ways that you can start to heal and balance your own sexual energy.

1. Do Qigong

Qigong is the art of cultivating your internal energy. If you haven’t already learned some qigong, then stop what you’re doing and go sign up for my free online qigong course, or go learn Lifting The Sky for free.

There are advanced qigong exercises that are specifically designed for cultivating sexual vitality (more about those below), but you don’t need those. Even a simple 2 minute daily qigong routine will help tremendously.

2. Sleep More

In our culture, we say silly things like, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”

No, you won’t.  But you may in fact die sooner because you don’t sleep enough.

In the qigong tradition, sleep is considered to be one of the major ways that the body restores and heals itself.

It’s also super important for hormone regulation. That’s why morning sex can be so powerful.

Get more sleep for 30 days in a row, and you may find that your libido suddenly gets stronger and healthier.

3. Exercise Your Pelvic Floor

This type of exercise, which involves flexing the pubococcygeus muscle, is often called “kegels”. But it’s not just for women.

The ancient Taoists encouraged both men and women to practice this type of exercise.

There are many versions, but the easiest way to get started is to simply stop the stream while urinating. This is a good way to make it a habit. Stop and start the stream several times each time you go to the bathroom.

Later, once you’ve got the hang of it, you can flex the pelvic floor without urinating. The beauty of this exercise is that it’s invisible, so you can practice it all day long!

Don’t tense the body or legs while you do this. And try not to hold your breath either. Lift and hold like this for 10 seconds, and then release.

For men, it should feel almost as if you are retracting the testicles up into the body. For women, it should feel (or so I’ve been told) that you are drawing a small egg up into the vagina and toward the cervix.

The ancient Taoists go one step further for women. Basically, they talk about doing kegels with resistance. This technique is beyond the scope of this article (and beyond the scope of my experience), but in short, it’s involves doing kegels with a jade egg in the vagina.

4. Practice The Small Universe

The Small Universe is an advanced Taoist qigong exercise that I’ve already talked about in depth. It’s not for beginners. If you mess with this technique before you’re ready, you’ll probably just block your energy even more.

But if you already know the Small Universe, then it’s an awesome choice for cultivating sexual vitality. If you’ve been practicing the Small Universe for more than a few months, then you should have already seen some improvement in your sexual vitality.

Men should experience harder erections, a higher sex drive, and greater control over ejaculation. Women should experience increased wetness, a stronger libido, and increased pleasure. At higher levels, when both partners are practicing the Small Universe, sex can become a deep, spiritual practice.

5. Practice The Small Wheel

If already you know the Small Universe, then the Small Wheel is easy.

The Small Wheel involves circulating the energy in a circle from dantian, down to huiyin, up to mingmen, and then back to dantian. So rather than the larger circuit that we do in the Small Universe, this circuit is smaller.

I feel like I should reiterate that this is not for beginners. If you don’t know the Small Universe, then you shouldn’t mess with the Small Wheel. Beginners should focus on simpler and safer techniques, like Lifting The Sky, and the next exercise, Belly Breathing.

6. Learn Belly Breathing:

Belly breathing is not necessarily a qigong technique. Singers do it. Some yoga schools also do it. It’s a skill that you had as a baby, and have probably lost. But it’s easy to regain.

Learn to breathe from your belly, regardless of the method. Belly breathing stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, encourages the relaxation response, improves digestion, and (drumroll) nurtures sexual vitality. Here’s a trick that will help.

Lie down and place a heavy book on your lower belly, just below your belly button. Breathe naturally, but gradually allow your breathing to come from your lower belly. The book should rise as your breathe in, and fall as you breathe out.

7. Take a Chill Pill! 

Stress creates cortisol (also known as the stress hormone). And cortisol messes with your sex drive (and your health).

You need a solution to stress in your life. Obviously, I’m a fan of qigong and tai chi.  Maybe your choice is yoga, or some sort of meditation. Great. But you need a solution.

If you don’t have a solution yet, then try my free class.

From there, I highly recommend that you commit to doing 2 minutes of qigong every day.

Stress management is more important than all the other things on your to-do list.

8. Hang Out

Humans are social animals. Spending time with other humans can have a dramatic effect on cortisol (see above) and oxytocin (see below). When you lowering cortisol levels and raise oxytocin levels, your libido (and your overall health) will improve.

9. Hug it Out

While you’re hanging out with friends and family, go ahead and hug!.

Hugging stimulates a hormone called oxytocin, sometimes called the “cuddle hormone”.  This hormone is associated with all sorts of benefits, including stress relief, depression relief, weight loss, and pain relief.

And yes, pets count!

10. Walk it Out

Exercise is important, and there’s no simpler form of exercise than walking. In the world of Chinese medicine, the only form of exercise that is better than walking is qigong. And even if you know qigong, you should still walk every day.

I have and Apple Watch, which are also digital super-pedometers. They measure all kinds of things, like distance walked, number of steps, number of flights climbed, calories burned, etc.

They say that a healthy person should take 10,000 steps per day. Unless you’re already very active, you’re probably going to get a huge wake up call when you first start using the Fitbit. You’re probably closer to 2000 steps than 10,000.

Increase the number of steps, and you’ll gradually watch a lot of your sexual blockages melt away. You’ll also have more energy, and sleep better. Sounds like a good deal to me!

11. Get Your Yoga On

The ancient Taoists didn’t talk about yoga, which is an Indian art. They talked about qigong, which is a Chinese art.

But yoga can definitely help.

I’m not a yoga expert, but if I look at the art from a Chinese medical perspective, it’s clear that the postures help to open up the flow of energy through the body. This, in turn, will help to gradually clear some of the sexual blockages.

Personally, I prefer qigong and strongly believe that it will be bigger than yoga one day. But to each their own, and if yoga works for you, then keep working it!

12. Meditate

Lately, people are talking about sitting meditation being the cure for just about everything. And it can be true — for some people.

Not everyone is ready for sitting meditation. If it doesn’t work for you, then don’t feel guilty about trying something else. (I recommend trying forms of moving meditation like qigong and tai chi.)

If sitting meditation calms you, gets you into a deeply relaxed state, and helps you to quiet the mind, then it’s also going to help you to unblock your sexual energy. So keep going!

13. Men — Ditch the Tightie Whities

Believe it or not, tight underwear constricts the flow of blood and energy to the male genitals. Wear boxers, or boxer briefs, not “tightie whities”.

14. Squat

Squats are great for lots of things, including sexual health. If you know the qigong exercise called Three Levels To Earth, then practice that. If not, just learn what they call an air squat. This a conventional, physical exercise, and it won’t have quite the same effect as qigong exercises, but it’s close enough for jazz.

Squatting opens up the pelvic area (called the kua in qigong and tai chi terminology), massages the internal organs, and promotes a healthier production of hormones. I recommend doing them throughout the day. If you sit a lot for work (see #15), the get up and take a “squatting break” at least once an hour.

15. Sit Less

Sitting is the new smoking. That’s what all the research says. Sitting is killing us by slowly messing with our hormones, our metabolism, and our energy levels.  This can wreak havoc on our libido.

The solution is to take breaks. Every hour, without fail, get up from your desk. Walk around, do some squats, do the 2-Minute Drill, or whatever. You might also consider getting some sort of standing desk. Or better yet, get your boss to buy one for you!

16. Masturbate

Practice makes perfect! One of the best ways to harmonize and unblock your sexual energy is to masturbate.

Hold your horses, men. Notice that I didn’t say anything about ejaculation. And with good reason. According to the ancient Taoists, men must be extremely careful in how often they ejaculate. If you ejaculate too frequently, you’ll drain your energy. (On the other hand, if you ejaculate too infrequently, your energy will stagnate.)

Two thousand years ago, the Su Nu Jing (素 女 經) , a classic text on Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), advised how frequently a man should ejaculate to maintain optimal health. The following chart shows the guidelines from that classic text.

Your miles may vary.

For women, the same rules don’t apply. According to the ancient Taoists, women lose energy from menstruation and child birth, not from orgasm. This means that women have a carte blanche when it comes to masturbation and orgasm.  There’s no such thing as “too often”.

This is a big topic.  If you’re interested, I’ll write a separate article entirely on masturbation.  Let me know in the comments below (or send me an email if you’re too shy).

17. Just Do it!

I saved the best for last.  Having sex — satisfying, intimate, passionate sex — is part of the solution.

Part of what’s causing our sexual blockages is that Americans just don’t have sex often enough.  We’re too busy, too stressed, or too tired.   Whereas other countries are doing it a few times a week, we’re doing it a few times a month, or with many couples, a few times a year!

There’s no easy fix for this one.  It’s a complex problem.  My best advice is to work on the tips above.  Start with yourself.  As you clear your own sexual blockages, you may be surprised to find that things suddenly start to flow more smoothly with your lover.

What Do You Think?

Do you have anything to add to the list?  Did I miss anything?  Go ahead and add it to the comments below.  I’m interested in hearing from you.

From the heart,
Sifu Anthony

The post 17 Ways To Unblock Your Sexual Energy appeared first on Flowing Zen.

Today is Valentine’s day — a day meant for love and chocolate. But typically, that love is given to another person. So is the chocolate.

What if, instead of focusing so much love outward, you focused some of it inward?

Would that be wrong? Would it be selfish?

Nope. It would be wise. It would be healthy. I’ll explain why, and I’ll also explain how you can do it.

If you have trouble loving yourself, then you have an imbalance.  Don’t worry. You’re not alone. Millions of people suffer from the same imbalance, whether they realize it or not.

Yin and Yang

In Tai Chi terms, this imbalance is called a disharmony of Yin and Yang. Love is a form of energy, and like all forms of energy, it must be balanced. Otherwise problems arise.

Love that moves outward is considered Yang. Love that moves inward is considered Yin.

If too much energy moves outward, and not enough moves inward, then you have a Yang imbalance. If you want to be happier and healthier, if you want to have more fulfilling relationships, then you need to balance that out.

The Yang Personality

If you’ve read this far, then you’re probably the type of person who has too much Yang, and not enough Yin (in terms of love).

Chances are, you’re always trying to help people, even if it means sacrificing your own needs and desires. You probably don’t even think that your own needs and desires are important.

Am I right?

How do I know this? Because I’m specifically writing this article for you, not for the other type of imbalance (i.e. those with too much Yin).

Neither the Yin nor the Yang imbalance is better or worse than the other. Both are problematic. It’s the balance point in the middle that you want. 

Like the Buddha said, we want the middle path.  If we tighten the sitar string too much, it will break; if we make it too loose, it won’t play a song.

But this article is directed toward those who are more Yang, those who send too much energy outward.

Nurses, for example, often have this imbalance. When it comes to love, they tend to send it outward. Their love is more Yang.

And they neglect themselves in the process. Often, after 10-20 years in the field, their health deteriorates to a point where they can no longer ignore it.  (And that’s typically when they join my classes.)

More Yin, Please

If you’re like this, then you want more Yin in your life.  And perhaps a little less Yang.  Ultimately, you want the harmony between the two.  It’s this harmony that that leads to both happiness and fulfillment.

This is the secret behind Tai Chi.  When Yin and Yang are in harmony, everything flows effortlessly.  But when Yin and Yang are out of whack, then trouble starts.  This secret holds true for martial arts, for health, for relationships, for the planet, and for the cosmos itself.

This concept of harmony is sorely lacking in our society.  I suspect that, for many of you, the concept is totally foreign.  You’re probably not used to thinking this way.  And that’s okay.  Now you’re learning to think differently!

Save Yourself, Save the World

What do flight attendants teach you before the airplane takes off?

They teach you to first put the oxygen mask on yourself. Why? Because if you don’t put it on yourself first, then you’re going to pass out before you even get a chance to help others.

Do you want to save the world?  Do you want to help as many people as possible?  I certainly do.  That’s my mission.  But people like us often make a critical mistake: We put the oxygen mask on others before ourselves.

This is exactly what we see with nurses and others who suffer from the Yang type of imbalance.   They try to put the mask on everyone else first.  Sure, it works for a little while.  But in the end, this isn’t the best way to help people (or oneself).

The secret is to start with yourself.  Transform yourself.  That will be your gift to the world.

For example, if I had not started with myself, if I hadn’t healed my depression and my sick heart, I would not be able to do what I do today.  I’m able to help so many people today because I put the oxygen mask on myself first. 

Even today, even after all these years, I still have to be careful.  I have a tendency to send my energy outward, to constantly try to help others.  But if I do too much, then I have no energy for myself or my wife.

In fact, I made this mistake in 2012.  I overextended myself, worked 80+ hours a week, and as a result, I began to burn out.  Thankfully, I caught myself.  I know that, if I want to help as many people as possible, and if I want to continue helping them for years and years, then I have to send some love inward.

How to Love Yourself

By now, I hope you see the importance of loving yourself.  That’s the first step.  And it’s a big one.  Once you decide to fix this imbalance, once you commit to sending more love inward, things will start to change.

But how do you do it?  How do you actually start sending love inward?  I’m not going to give you a laundry list of tips for loving yourself.  There are plenty of articles like that on the Internet.  I’m not saying that any of those things, like journaling or  daily affirmations, are bad.  But to me, there’s one thing that you can do that is more important — and more effective — than anything else.

Start to meditate.

By meditating daily, you will automatically start to love yourself more.  It’s a natural result of quieting the mind.   The self-talk and self-doubt gradually disappear, and your natural self gradually appears.  And when you start to see your natural self, it will be easy to love it simply because it is loveable

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

But sitting meditation probably isn’t for you.  Unless you are lucky enough to find an amazing teacher, sitting meditation will be hard.  You’ll do better with moving meditation, like Qigong and Tai Chi, or even Yoga.  If you don’t have a teacher, then you can start with my free stuff, or Lifting The Sky (and keep an eye out for my upcoming book).

Make Yourself a Priority

For me, meditating daily (with Qigong and Tai Chi) is a priority.  It’s even more important than teaching.  If I don’t take care of myself, how am I going to take care of my students?  So I make the time to practice every day.

A few weeks ago, a student from out of town wanted to schedule a private lesson with me in the morning. It was the only time that she had available. But I teach in the evenings, so the morning is my personal practice time.

Even though she offered to pay me $200 for my time, even though she needed my help — I said no to her.

It wasn’t easy.  I truly wanted to help her.

But my personal practice time is sacred. It is precious to me. It is my way of sending some love inward, every single day.

(By the way, the student ended up rearranging her schedule and coming to class in the evenings.  So in the end, everyone got what they needed.)

It’s precisely because I see my life as valuable and meaningful that I make the time to meditate every day. That’s one of my secrets to discipline. Meditating is a priority, every single day. In fact, I don’t think there’s anything I do in a day that is more important than practicing.

Do you see your own life as valuable and meaningful? Can you embrace this philosophy of sending love inward, of taking care of yourself first? I hope so because the world desperately needs people like you.  And we need you to be happy, healthy, and balanced.

I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below. Did this post resonate with you?  Do have any questions? Go ahead and post a comment below. It’s easy.

From the heart,
Sifu Anthony

The post How (and Why) You Should Love Yourself More appeared first on Flowing Zen.