I needed some extra-strength medicine this morning, so I reached into my meditative medicine cabinet and pulled out a 2500-year-old Zen technique called Maranasati.
I was 26 when I experienced my first episode of major depression. Back then, I didn’t realize I was depressive. All I knew was that there was an invisible force sucking me into a vortex of despair…
I believe that depression is an epic, personal battle against the darker forces of the human spirit. Recently, after an unexpected Zen-like awakening, I got my metaphoric hands on another weapon to use against depression. I now wield a mighty weapon called self love.
I was only 33. I was young, fit, and strong. But I felt like I was having a heart attack.
Almost as quickly as it had come in, the storm passed, just as I was getting ready to go to the emergency room.
It wasn’t a heart attack. I later learned that it was an anxiety attack (sometimes called a panic attack).
Apparently, the signs are similar, and many people end up in the emergency room due to anxiety attacks.
Like many depressives, I have a secret.
It’s terrifies me to do this, but I’m going to share that secret with all of you now.
My secret is that I’m depressive.
Of course, this isn’t news. The fact that I’ve battled depression is all over my website and the Internet.
But you don’t know the whole story. I hid some of it.
I’m done hiding.